Orphans on the Galactic Tunnel Network (EarthCent Auxiliaries Book 3) Read online

  “It’s my turn,” John said, sliding out of his chair before Ellen could protest. “When the waitress brings my pastry, get it to go, and I’ll see you back at the ship.”

  Woojin snorted in amusement as the EarthCent Intelligence agent slipped out of the café and took off at a run. “I’ll assume this isn’t the first time.”

  “I think she does it just to embarrass us,” Ellen said. “Semmi gets plenty to eat at home. We took her to the bazaar this morning and she found a Grenouthian selling pirated dramas from all over the galaxy. We couldn’t drag her away from the bargain bins when it was time for John’s appointment with M793qK.”

  “And she forgot the way back to your ship?”

  “As near as I can figure out from the instruction manual, Semmi is the emotional age of a teenager. It’s tough to get her to do anything she doesn’t want to do, and she has very definite views about her rights, which includes sampling any food on offer.”

  “The volunteer said she ate half of a hotdog out of a man’s hand while he was chewing.”

  “Gryphons are fast eaters. I think she believes that anybody who moves their hand away from their mouth is done,” Ellen said, and then pointed at her own ear. “Yes?”

  “I have an incoming ping from the bazaar for anybody associated with the gryphon,” Flower informed her. “Will you accept?”

  “Yes.”

  “You’re the gryphon’s person?” asked a voice in a machine-gun cadence that usually indicated a Grenouthian whose words were being translated by the implant on the fly.

  “One of them,” Ellen replied cautiously.

  “She took off before telling me where to deliver all these memory chips of bargain dramas she bought. The mulebot I summoned just got here.”

  “Oh, just tell it John’s ship and Flower will see it gets to the right place.” Ellen hesitated a moment. “Would you happen to know why she didn’t just take the memory chips with her? She was wearing her belly pack.”

  “They wouldn’t fit,” the Grenouthian told her. “I almost ordered two mulebots, but it looks like the one will manage.”

  Ellen dropped her hand and offered the captain and Lynx a wan smile. “It seems that Semmi took advantage of our absence to stock up on viewing material for vacation. I hope there’s enough left on our ship’s programmable cred to pay Flower’s docking fees.”

  “The tea and pastry is our treat,” Lynx told her.

  Two

  “You’re sure you don’t want to come with me to the embassy?” Larry asked Georgia while he washed the breakfast dishes. “You’ll get to meet the ambassador.”

  “Not when I have the opportunity to talk with the most famous human in the galaxy,” Georgia said. “When I was over at the chandlery looking through the new Zero-G rations, Kevin mentioned that he told Aisha about the Verlock educational games I’ve been stocking. She wants to meet and see if I have anything she can use on Let’s Make Friends.”

  “You haven’t met Aisha during one of our previous stops in Mac’s Bones? She and Paul live in the habitat right next to Joe’s old ice harvester.”

  “I saw her from a distance a few times when I was taking the kidnap avoidance training course for journalists that EarthCent Intelligence runs here for the Galactic Free Press, but I never spoke to her.”

  “All right then, we’ll divide and conquer,” Larry said. “I’ll see you in a few hours.”

  “That’s not what it means,” Georgia commented as she pulled up the inventory list of educational games she maintained on her reporter’s tab.

  “What?”

  “Divide and conquer. It’s not the people that divide who do the conquering. It’s the other way around.”

  “Really? I guess that explains why gamers are always going on about never splitting the party. And I’ve got to run or I’m going to be late.”

  Georgia looked up in time for a quick kiss as Larry slipped past her and did a fireman’s slide down the ladder from the bridge of his two-man trader to the cargo deck. The hatch that doubled as a ramp was already lowered, and he walked rapidly through the campground for small ships. Then his eyes were drawn to a ship of an alien design that he didn’t recognize, and an older man who was sitting on a large toolbox and nursing a coffee waved him over.

  “Hey, Joe,” Larry greeted the owner of Mac’s Bones. “Looks like an interesting project, but I’ve got an appointment with your wife at the embassy and I’m running late. I’ll stop on my way back.”

  “Your appointment is on hold. Dorothy was up half the night with our fussy new grandson and now Kelly is babysitting him to give her a break. I’m surprised Kelly’s assistant didn’t ping you.”

  “She probably did,” Larry said. He stared off into space and navigated through the menus on his heads-up display with practiced eye movements. “I’ve gotten into the habit of turning off my ping notifications at night while we’re here because of all the lists I’m on. I must have forgotten to enable it this morning.” He read something that only he could see, and then said, “The new appointment is in a half-hour. Do you think Dorothy will be ready to take over again by then?”

  “Sounds reasonable, but—Beowulf,” Joe called to the giant Cayl hound who was sprawled on the deck. “Let us know when Kelly comes out of Dorothy’s place.”

  Beowulf yawned, turned his head so it was pointed in the general direction of the cargo container that had been converted into a home, and then closed his eyes again. Larry’s face betrayed his lack of confidence in the appointed watcher.

  “It’s all in the ears,” Joe reassured him. “Do you recognize this ship type?”

  “Going by the hull it’s some sort of trader, but I’ve never seen one before,” Larry admitted. “The styling reminds me of the sort of ships that some Grenouthian merchants use.”

  “Bingo. But the bunnies make a point of not keeping ships in service for more than a couple of thousand years. They’re always improving and restyling.”

  “Why isn’t the used market flooded with them?”

  “Because the basic technology doesn’t change that much, so they reuse practically all the parts,” Joe said. “It’s a compromise to keep the small shipyards busy without creating a lot of waste. This one was in the collection abandoned in long term parking that Aisha bought for Paul at the Stryx auction. He just brought it in last week and it’s in excellent condition. My son-in-law, Kevin, is fantasizing he’ll be able to talk my daughter into leaving the fashion business and bringing up their children as traders, but my guess is we’ll end up selling it.”

  “It would make a nice family trader,” Larry said, trying to imagine the interior. “The capacity must be at least double that of the standard Sharf two-man trader. How’s the layout?”

  “Four decks,” the ambassador’s husband said, holding up four fingers. “Engineering deck at the bottom, of course, but it’s standing room, not a crawl space, and then the main cargo deck, which does more than double the capacity of a Sharf trader. There’s a residential deck below the bridge, though the Grenouthian who owned this ship must have been solo because most of it was configured for more cargo storage.”

  “How much space does that leave on the bridge?”

  “The whole ship is broader in the beam than yours so there’s more deck area, but on the bridge, you can stretch and touch the ceiling everywhere except the center, where the nose bumps up.”

  “Lack of overhead space would make it tricky to mount all the Zero-G exercise equipment,” Larry said. “Did the last owner have a gym on his residential deck?”

  “Grenouthians don’t need to exercise in Zero-G to maintain their muscle mass, at least not unless they’re traveling for extended periods. It’s more or less the same with all the advanced species, though some of them do install exercise equipment just to help pass the time. Let’s go check on the progress,” Joe said, setting down his empty coffee mug and rising stiffly to his feet. “I stepped out for my second cup of coffee because my hands aren’t as st
eady as they once were and I didn’t want to risk it slopping out.”

  “I’d be afraid to travel in a ship that could be damaged by a spilled coffee,” Larry said doubtfully. “Is the Grenouthian tech that delicate?”

  “Oh, you could land this ship in an ocean and it would do just fine under water, better than any Earth-built submarine. But there was some sort of special unit attached to the main drive, and when we finally got the cover off, Paul pinged Jeeves to come take a look at it. It was full of alien tech that looked like spun glass, and I was almost afraid to breathe on it.”

  “Stryx Jeeves?”

  “He’s an old friend of Paul’s,” Joe explained as he led the way up the ramp. “You boys figure out what it is yet?”

  “Jeeves says it’s a popper,” Paul said and lifted his chin to acknowledge Larry. “You and Georgia can’t stay away from Union Station, can you?”

  “As it happens, Georgia is meeting with your wife later to talk about educational games,” Larry replied. “What’s a popper?”

  “A single-use jump drive, though the Grenouthian design allows for a factory refurbishment at a fraction of the cost of a new unit.”

  “I guess I’ve heard rumors about those but I’ve never seen one.”

  “The Grenouthians don’t sell them to aliens,” Jeeves said. “Their primary function is as a last-ditch escape mechanism, not unlike the old Verlock rescue network, but a ship that carries two poppers is capable of making a round trip. It’s nowhere near as cost-effective as traveling by tunnel or in a larger vessel with a true jump drive.”

  “But it’s so much smaller than a standard jump drive,” Larry said, examining the alien module. “Is it really that expensive to operate?”

  “Not in the sense that you’re thinking, but it’s mass limited,” the young Stryx explained, making a circular motion with his pincer to encompass the ship. “The design doesn’t scale up, and a fully laden ship around this size is near the limit of what it can handle. Plus the transfer is instantaneous, which plays havoc on the nervous systems of biological—what?” Jeeves let out a mechanical sigh and said, “It appears I’ve overstepped my bounds again. Forget I said anything.”

  Outside, Beowulf let out a couple of loud barks, and Joe informed Larry, “That’s your cue.”

  “I’ll drop in to take a look around when I get back,” the trader said as he turned for the ramp. “I’m not in any hurry to give up my Sharf trader, but maybe I can send an interested party your way.”

  Kelly was halfway to the exit from Mac’s Bones when Larry caught up with her. She was wearing a long skirt with a white blouse and a towel over one shoulder.

  “Ambassador,” he greeted her tentatively, unsure of how she preferred to be addressed outside of the embassy.

  “Larry,” she responded, recognizing him instantly. “You’ve come directly from Flower, right? How did Samuel look? Is he working too hard?”

  “Your son was doing well. I think he’s filled out a bit since the last time I saw him, and he mentioned something about taking up weight lifting as his required team sport. I spent a couple of days brainstorming with him and his wife about this trade ministry I’m supposed to be building and—but you know that already because that’s why I’m here.”

  “Yes,” Kelly said, leading the way to the lift tube in the corridor. “My special assistant filled me in on the details, and she and Daniel have altered their schedules so they can meet with you as well. EarthCent embassy.” The capsule began to move, and then, finally noticing the spit-up towel on her shoulder, the ambassador groaned, “Not again. Why didn’t you say something? Now I’ll have to take it into the office and bring it home tonight.”

  “I can carry it for you,” Larry offered.

  Kelly thought about it for a moment and then said, “No, you’d look even sillier than I do. Is Georgia excited about the prospect of visiting so many alien home worlds? I read all of her food articles but I don’t think you’ll find much that you can safely eat on those planets.”

  “She’s hoping to get some good interviews and expand her specialty trading in educational games. They’re starting to become a bit of an obsession with her.”

  “Everybody should have something that makes them a little crazy,” the ambassador said. “With me, it’s old books. Do you need any?”

  “All full up,” Larry lied, raising his hands as if to indicate that his ship was completely packed with books.

  The lift tube doors opened, and again Kelly led, filling Larry in on the history of various boutiques they passed on the way to the EarthCent embassy.

  “Where are my manners?” she suddenly exclaimed, coming to a halt. “Here you traveled all this way to see us and there aren’t any fresh donuts in the embassy. Hole Universe is just back that way a minute, and—”

  “I’m really not a donut eater,” Larry interrupted, and then immediately regretted his words when he saw the ambassador’s face fall. “But I’d be glad to run back and pick up a dozen if you like.”

  “No, it’s not necessary,” Kelly said with a sigh. “If you don’t like triple chocolate donuts, I certainly don’t need the calories.” She started walking again, and just before they reached the embassy, she added, “Triple chocolate. You’ll remember next time you’re here, won’t you?”

  “My pleasure,” he said, wondering if it was a formal offer to accept a bribe. If so, the EarthCent ambassador was a lot cheaper than any alien customs inspector he had ever encountered.

  “I pushed your appointments all back a half an hour and moved your meeting with Ambassador Gem to a lunch date,” Kelly’s special assistant greeted her. “There’s fresh coffee in the conference room, and Associate Ambassador Cohan is waiting for us.”

  “Thank you, Aabina. You remember Larry, I’m sure.”

  “Of course,” the Vergallian girl said, giving him a dazzling smile. “You’re the good sport who bought the Ministry of Trade at the Human Empire auction.”

  “Who was tricked into buying the Ministry of Trade,” Larry corrected her as they entered the conference room. “Are you going to be able to get me an audience with the Imperial Council?”

  “I’m trying, but they’ve been dragging their feet,” Aabina replied. “Despite my mother’s diplomacy, there’s still a substantial faction in the Empire of a Hundred Worlds who think we should have invaded Earth and installed royal rule before the Stryx made your homeworld a protectorate.”

  “Good morning,” Daniel greeted Larry, offering a handshake from his seat. “Forgive my not getting up but there’s a Cayl hound sleeping on my feet. Long story,” he added when the trader raised an eyebrow. “The station librarian forwarded me a cryptic ping from Flower a couple of days ago that you’d be delivering a verbal message. Shall we get that out of the way first?”

  Larry exhaled in irritation as he sat. “It’s the same old thing. Now that Flower’s officially part of the Conference of Sovereign Human Communities and is hosting the Human Empire headquarters she’s offering you discounted space for special functions like the annual meeting and trade show. The weird part is that she starts laughing like a maniac every time she brings it up. Sometimes I wonder if it’s true what they say about Dollnick artificial intelligence lacking stability.”

  “I think I can explain that,” Aabina said. “The CoSHC acronym is the same as for a special function in Human mathematics, specifically hyperbolic geometry. I believe it’s defined by the hyperbolic cosecant of a value divided by that value. Dollnick humor places an emphasis on double meanings, like offering special function space to an organization whose name is also a special function.”

  “Why would you even know something like that?” Kelly demanded. “I can’t imagine that Human mathematics was part of your royal training.”

  “Don’t you remember loaning me your Handbook of Mathematical Functions by Abramowitz and Stegun? I believe you said it was a gift from the Verlock ambassador.”

  “Oh, that book,” Kelly said. “Srythlan gave
it to me in hopes that I would embark on a course of self-improvement. He thought it was a children’s primer.”

  “I’ll have to laugh with Flower next time she brings it up,” Larry said. “Special functions. That’s not bad.”

  “Putting aside Flower’s desire to run everything, what do you think of the basic idea?” Daniel asked. “We’ve been holding the annual trade show and conference here on Union Station ever since it started, but maybe the time has come to try a change of venue.”

  “You’ll have to wait at least another two years,” Aabina informed them. “CoSHC signed a seven-year contract with the Empire Convention Center five years ago. If you break it, you have to pay back all of the discounts plus a penalty.”

  “Good, you can explain that to Flower next time you see her,” Daniel said to Larry. “Tell her that we’ll think about her offer after the contract is up.”

  “Are the introductions all prepared?” Kelly asked her special assistant.

  Aabina nodded and drew a sheaf of letters out of her valise. “Yes, it was fun getting in my calligraphy practice for all of those languages. The acid-etched copper one is for the Frunge, of course, and I had to get the station librarian to help with a few of the languages. I only trust myself in Drazen, Horten, and Frunge.”

  “I’ve heard you whistling Dollnick.”

  “I only know a few thousand words.” The Vergallian girl placed the stack in front of Kelly and handed her a felt-tipped pen.

  “Isn’t that a Mark-Up, the same kind we use on cargo containers?” Larry asked. “They’re erasable, you know.”

  Kelly colored slightly. “Sometimes my signature doesn’t come out the way I like on these formal documents, so when it’s not a ceremony, I sign in erasable marker and then spray it with Perma-Fix.”

  “These are letters of introduction for each of the oxygen-breathing tunnel network species that are represented on Union Station,” Aabina explained to Larry as the ambassador began working her way through the stack. “We thought it would be a good idea to confer as much status on you as possible because of the newness of the Human Empire.”